I generally have a problem with simple categories for human behavior such as the “Five Love Languages” because we are so complicated that no one tool fits us very well. On the other hand, I will take a look at the book to see what I can glean. It’s been a long time since I read it.

We are currently looking at providing podcasts. We will need to find someone who will stay on top of it and make it happen. Our web site has an archive of some of the previous years work that you can download. It would help if it was video and audio and that is another goal.

Thanks for your kind words and intelligent analysis. Learning to deny ourselves and follow Jesus is a lifelong task isn’t it.

warmly,
Brian

I was referred to you and your ministry by former members of Changepoint. The referral came with adulation for your messages and inspiration. I have listened to one of the podcasts in August and read through the sermon “Infatuation”. I must say in the case of the latter, it is refreshing to hear a minister frankly deal with this issue.

While generalizing usually gets us in trouble, empirical evidence would suggest that in the infatuation phase of a relationship, as you suggest, most men are looking for a sexual relationship and most women are looking for security. As we live our lives, we discovered that finding a woman whose primary focus in the relationship is on maintaining a high level of emotional and physical interdependence throughout the marriage, or finding a man whose wants a long term platonic relationship and is driven by providing security for love ones is, as you say, unrealistic and imagined!

It would seem however, for the most part, that men continue to provide the financial security out of necessity and self interest whereas women interest in the emotional and physical aspect wains fairly quickly.

Prior to my marriage, my father told me of the story of the couple who placed a cup next to their bed after marriage. Every time they made love during the first 2 years of their marriage, they put a dime in the cup. At the end of the two years, they agreed going forward to take a dollar out of the cup every time they made love. Twenty years later, there was still money in the cup.

I guess that must be what you meant when you ended with: “Actually survival means accepting that suffering is part of life for everyone. Jesus suffered and so will you. Pain is not an enemy. It is a tool and when handled properly will shape our hearts towards good character and solid maturity.”

I would love to have you drill down in another sermon on this subject played against Gary Chapman’s “Five Love Languages”. Would matching similar love languages as a tool during courtship, span the abyss that seems to separate Men from Mars and Women from Venus?

Lastly, is there a chance that you will resume providing podcasts of your sermons for those whose work prevents them from attending your church?